says good bye 'two thousand debate' and Hello 'two thousand decline'! ....Happy New Year! May the Cow bring you more that than Rat took away.

tinhks it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are,
the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

is so fast that they had to slow the film down so you could see his moves.

estimate's that 0.7% of the world’s population is drunk. Right now.

wishes you, your family and your monkey... a Very. Merry. Christmas. Ho Ho Ho!

saw a backward band that sings inverse.

has hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: fear of long words.

wondering why there's only one Monopolies Commission.

used to eat a lot of natural foods until he learned that most people die of natural causes.

thinks if you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

forgot to pay his exorcist and has been repossessed.

was watching a Mexican basketball tournament. It was all Juan on Juan ...

thinks its funny that China has more English speakers than the United States, but try finding a good hot dog in Beijing... geez...

is amazed that McDonald's is the largest toy distributor in the world!

is looking for a shorter way of describing a monosyllable

wonder's why his duck’s quack doesn’t echo.

wonder why his duck’s quack doesn’t echo.

thinks that if Shakespeare can invent the words "assassination" and "bump" that he should invent some words too.

knowing that Cockroaches can live for 9 days after their head has been cut off, is wondering how long wall street will.

asks why are Boxing rings are square.

wonders how you write "do not touch" in brail.

is wondering how does that Teflon stuff stick to the pan?

is wondering how does that Teflon stick stuff to the pan?

'should be so lucky' to be 'spinning around' with a 'X' Woman tonight

is thankful he's not a turkey

is in an actual re-enactment.

always proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

thinks suburbs are areas where they cut down trees and then name the streets after them.

only has, what he took with him...

understands it is the voice of life that calls us to come... and learn... (clifford stoll...ted.com)

wonders if Adam had a belly button?

knows the more you sweat in training, the less you bleed in war.

started out with nothing, and still has most of it...

got a phone call today to do a presentation at the fire station. Packed up and went along. Turned out it was a bloody hoax.

got a phone call today to do a presentation at the fire station. Packed up and went alone. Turned out it was a bloody hoax.

is a new kind of fast today... (www.newkindoffast.com)

only has Thirty seconds. That doesn't give us a lot of time.

is actually quite pleasant until he's awake.

thinks whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

thinks Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

's future depends on his dreams. So he's going to sleep in the office tomorrow.

's 'Outlook' was not closed properly.
This file is being checked for problems.
4 minutes remaining. 4 minutes remaining.

is hungry... but wonders if a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

wonders how come Writers write but Fingers don't fing? And Grocers don't groce and Hammers don't ham?

is wondering how a slim chance and a fat chance be the same.

had lunch with a chess champion the other day. He knew he was a chess champion because it took him 20 minutes to pass the salt.

says procrastinate now. Don't put it off.

humming... Stacks on deck. Patron on Ice. We can pop bottles all night. Baby you can have whatever you like. He Said you can have whatever you like.

is chasing grasshoppers on an elephant! Come hear little grasshoppers!

says good onya USA!

is as welcome as a pork chop in a synagogue.

hopes Obama will be happy as a dog in a hub cap factory.

saw that in the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

knows that when you seek it, you cannot find it.

wonders why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets anyway...

puts the funk back into dysfunktion...

says very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes...

wonders what is this mind?

wonders why phonetic spelled the way it sounds

is thinking a clean desk is a sign of a cluttered cupboard.

's favorite animal is steak.

thinks just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn’t mean the circus has left town.

thinks he who knows nothing, doubts nothing

Peter agrees that gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.via Ping.fm - 10:08am - Comment

Peter agrees that gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.via Ping.fm - 9:54am - Comment

Peter posted “says 'Ping'” - Comment or View your FriendFeed ». Comment

Peter says 'Ping'.via Ping.fm - 9:46am

 Brian Tucker at 9:49am October 18

"Pong'

Sad Guys on Trading Floors

Source: sadguysontradingfloo...

sad... but funny...

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Peter thinks one today is worth two tomorrows. 12:06am

 Jeffrey Lo at 12:18am October 17

and the way the stock market is going, 1 share today may be worth 2 shares tomorrow.

 Matthew Wallington at 2:09am October 17

Haha, good point. Very true. I'd say more like 1:3 rather than 1:2 though :)

 Peter M Dingle at 11:25pm October 17

buy low ...sell hi!

Yesterday

Peter thinks the true test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to urinate. 8:28am - Comment

Oct 15

Peter says try spelling Evian backward. Hows that for two bucks a bottle. 8:23am

 Cindy Cheng at 9:33am October 15

Suckas!

Peter walks into a bar sits down and hears a voice say, "You look nice today." He asks "Who is that?" The barman says, "Those are the peanuts. They're complimentary". 9:54am

 Greg Koch at 2:54am October 16

An Irishman walks into a bar and asks for three shots of whiskey and quickly downs them all. The barkeep asks, “Why three?” to which the man said, “One each for me, me dad, and me brother back in Ireland.” From that day forward, he came in every week and ordered three shots. One day, however, he ordered only two shots. The barkeep asked, with ...  Read More

Oct 13

Peter wonders if you spin an oriental man in a circle three times does he become disoriented? 4:38pm

 Jee Kim at 7:20pm October 13

I would say so u dingle, if you take anything inanimate and spin it a few times, it still is inanimate :)

Show 2 more comments...

 Jee Kim at 11:27am October 16

come grab a drink with us on tomorrow night...

 Peter M Dingle at 7:02am October 17

cool! txt me :)

Oct 12

Peter wonders whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it! 12:59pm - Comment

Oct 10

Peter wonders what if there were no hypothetical questions? 8:42am

 Nisha Patel at 10:04am October 10

Hey Mr. Dingle!! Long time no see! When r u visitng LA next? Just had to tell u how very entertaining your status remarks are!!!! keep em coming! hope all is well with u!! cheers!

Oct 9

Peter is thinking that a golf ball will always travel furthest, when hit in the wrong direction. 8:43am

 Elvin Ong at 12:28pm October 9

Boy can I attest to that fact. I also firmly believe trees and water attract golf balls.

Peter wrote a note COMPUTER PROBLEM SELF-REPORT FORM. Comment

Peter is not surprised that most cows give more milk when they listen to music. 8:01am - Comment

Oct 8

Peter went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So he ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. 6:10pm

 Tim Thraves at 7:48pm October 8

I'll have pancakes in the Age of Enlightenment.

 Megan Leddin at 8:48pm October 8

Dingers.....you are surprisingly witty!

 Peter M Dingle at 8:03am October 9

...i was going to have something light during the dark ages.

Oct 7

Peter has had a holiday, and I’d like to take it up professionally.8:28am - Comment

Oct 6

Peter thinks no matter which direction you start it's always against the wind coming back... 3:37pm

 Craig Nastanski at 4:26pm October 6

Then the wind will just change to be against you again on the way back .... it always works out that way ...

Oct 5

Peter thinks few women admit their age and few men act it. 7:25pm

 Sorel Roget at 9:31pm October 5

Haha! This one's great! (and so true!)

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Peter wonders why do they put braille on the drive-through bank machines? 9:16am - Comment

Peter wonders if mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons do Chinese mothers use toothpicks? 9:15am - Comment